Assuming the Worst

Orlando Magic 110, New York Knicks 96

It's not often that sportswriters go to a game assuming one of the coaches is an idiot. Despite any notions of impartiality, sportswriters certainly have some assumptions: Peyton Manning is a good passer, Bill Belichick knows what he's doing, Tiger Woods will probably pull away down the stretch.

But you don't see this often: The head coach is a raging moron, and we should have expected the worst.

But the age of caution is long gone in New York, especially when the Knicks are concerned. And sportswriters are gleefully unleashing some verbal uppercuts. The Post weighed in most savagely after Wednesday's loss to the Magic, with writer Marc Berman delivering this lede:

"Isiah Thomas' ballyhooed changes to the starting lineup last night caused more chaos and confusion."

But the article didn't end there. The hits just kept coming:

"With Thomas taking another page from the 'how-to-get-fired' handbook, the Knicks (8-20) notched their 20th loss last night, folding in the fourth quarter in a 110-96 defeat to the Magic at Amway Arena. The only thing Thomas accomplished was Curry and Randolph weren't on the court together all night. In the land of make-believe, this was unbelievable even by Thomas standards. After two days, Thomas stuck with his new starting lineup for two minutes. Then he had an entirely new alignment to start the second half. ... But after Curry picked up two fouls 2:06 into the game, Randolph was inserted and Curry was not heard from again. That is, until the start of the fourth quarter, when Thomas inexplicably attempted to defrost Curry, who was shocked to be put back in."

"How-to-get-fired" handbook, land of make-believer, defrost Curry - that's enough vitriol to make me giggle with pleasure. Add to that the hyperbolic, punny header: "Magic Kingdumb," followed by the equally insulting sub-headline, "Isiah Bungles Lineup Shakeup in Orlando." My only regret is that I didn't actually see the game, my night being occupied with prior plans.

Ken Berger of Newsday delivered an almost equally vicious lede in his gamer:

"Only the Knicks could make a drastic lineup change and have it blow up in their face in two minutes and six seconds. Only the Knicks could bench the wrong big man, anger both of them, bring the guy who should have been benched to begin with into the game after he'd sat for 34 minutes, and turn a three-point game into a blowout in the first 2 1/2 minutes of the fourth quarter. Confused? So are the Knicks. So, evidently, is the coach. Nothing makes sense with this team anymore, not after last night's inexplicable 110-96 loss to the Orlando Magic. 'We're all just trying to find answers here,' Knicks coach Isiah Thomas said. Sure. Wrong ones."

Howard Beck of the Times was a little more sedate, but even he had to offer some criticism:

"Coach Isiah Thomas furiously shuffled bodies all night in a vain search for an identity on a team that has none."

With blows this voluble landing, it seems fair to ask if the sportswriters were piling on. The answer is simple - of course they were, and the Knicks deserved it. What's more, piling on is fun in this situation. It's what this blog is dedicated to.

My last question was will Curry bit the dust? I'm still not sure if the answer is yes or no. Despite pre-game speculation almost unanimous on a switch of Curry for David Lee, Isiah kept Curry in the lineup over the far more productive Randolph, who was benched for Lee. But then Curry played less than five minutes overall, giving way to Randolph, who played most of the game and provided plenty of offense.

The other lineup change was even more surprising as the False Prophet put in Jared Jeffries for Fred Jones. No matter what Jones has done wrong over the past month, I think just about everyone knows that Jeffries is not the answer.

The important thing is that the Knicks are 8-20. Unfortunately, the pack of terrible teams is large this year, but New York has a good opportunity to secure the title of "Worst in the East" soon. The Knicks' biggest rival now is the Miami Heat, who are a half-game back.

Next up: Bulls at Knicks at noon on Sunday.
Best-case scenario - Jim Boylan's rise to head coach spurs the Bulls to a 40-point win. Buoyed by the success, the Bulls go on to sweep the Knicks over the season, ending with Viktor Khryapa dropping 60 points in a couple of months.
Worst-case scenario - The Knicks are so impressed they decide to trade their next two first-round picks for Viktor Khryapa.